Semi-Cold Feet

I don't know how to put it, really, but I'm hesitating to go this summer. It's natural for the reality of a cross-cultural trip to hit you like that, right? I've been in the rush of the last month of school going here, doing this, finishing projects, working, hanging out, stressed and loving the experience at the same time. And then I stop for a sec and think, "I'm not cut out for this. How can one month make me feel off track?" And yet it has. Then I begin to think that it's not that God hasn't called me to go, and it's quite probable I should go, but boy how quickly my mind is distracted. Spiritual warfare is great, and it's good to realize that now as opposed to later. It's not that I should refrain from going, but I should immediately begin to have the mindset of God - a passion for what He's doing in this world.

That's where I am now. I'm pausing long enough to open my eyes, wake up and see what God's doing. And not only see it, but listening for His voice so that I can take part in it in the way He wants me to. I would appreciate your prayers.

Culture

Wow, there's been so much I've been learning about missions and culture, but I haven't had two free seconds to sit down and formulate my thoughts. Right now I really don't have time, but I'm tired of real work, so I'm going to write my thoughts on culture.

Yesterday I had a really awesome conversation with a friend of a friend. She happened to be in the UCup when we were chatting (the friend and I) and sat down. Somehow the topic of missions came up. I started advertising Perspectives, told what it was all about and encouraged both women to take it whether they're in Colorado, North Carolina or wherever they end up. Then, the friend of the friend asked me about what I defined as "missions" so I told her about Perspectives' stance on the terms "Evangelism," "Regular Missions," and "Frontier Missions." [I can tell you too, just ask]. Then the friend of the friend told about how she's not really into missions lately and how she see it as culture ruining. After explaining herself, I explained what I learned from Perspectives. I told her that certainly some missionaries do westernize cultures, but the best form of missions actually enhances the culture by bringing about social action, freeing them from their sins, and allowing them to worship the one true God within their normal cultural practices (given that they're, of course, not sinful practices). It was fun to get her perspective because she's from the church and struggling with the idea of missions. She didn't know that many are being trained in culture-enhancing rather than culture-destroying strategies. She pointed to a few big culture-destroying missions movements from history and it helped me to realize that it may still be quite a problem and that it definitely has been in the past.

With that said, I've been reflecting a lot on how the gospel can naturally spread within a culture that's foreign to me and how I might be able to facilitate that now and in the long run. What does the church look like if it doesn't have a Sunday morning service with a band up front and youth group Sunday night? What if they have Friday services? What if they sit on the ground? What if I don't understand how they worship? What if I don't enjoy the way they sing to the Lord? And those are only the surface-level questions. Here's a deeper one: What if they interpret the Bible differently? What if they have different moral standards than I do (more or less strict - either way)? And at the heart of everything: What if I don't know or am unprepared to know enough about the culture to be able to truly minister to them in the way that they need? I really wish I could articulate myself better...there's so much more than even this, but I just can't formulate it into words. The chapters in Perspectives does much better :-) .

In one book I'm reading it points out how the Eastern worldview can actually help us understand the Bible because the Bible is an Eastern text. For example, Moses (see Deut 3:23-26) shifts the blame from himself to the Israelites. We take this blame shifting as lying, but the Eastern mindset doesn't see it as lying. He just wasn't "accepting public blame," so this book says. The author often asks those in the East to help him understand his Bible - and they do! This intrigues me because it causes me to realize that I look at Scripture with a biased, individualistic American mindset. If I am in a different culture, I need to be aware of their worldviews and strip myself of my cultural biases while I'm there. But this is very difficult and much research on the culture is needed to be able to do this adequately.

Math and Missions - You Knew This Was Coming

In math class today we discussed facilitating the room when students are exploring an idea in groups. My prof talked about how it was most strategic for the teacher to help just the one student so that he could, in turn, teach the whole group he was with. It was less strategic for her to stay at that one group the whole time. If she can help one student at each group, then the whole class is helped because at least one person in each group is an expert who can help the other students understand the concepts at hand.

So, how does this relate to missions? Well, if every believer evangelizes every one of their friends and family who in turn evangelizes their friends and family, etc, etc then the whole world will not be evangelized. Why? Because there are cultural bridges to be crossed that won't happen unless we bridge the gap to cultures that do not yet have Christ. It's really hard for the gospel to "jump" into other cultures until they see that it is relevant to them (which is a difficult process). See once a "vibrant, indigenous church" is planted in a people group then those believers can reach the people within their own culture much better than you or I. But the church must be started before that can happen. So, it is strategic for missions to go where no one knows of Christ so that a church can be built and then they can reach their own people. See, it's just like a classroom.

So, I guess that's not math, but it is education. I think they relate quite well and my learning has deepened.

On The Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness

I realized last fall why I like Andrew Peterson's music - imagery. You see, there are loads and loads of songs that are good and Christ-centered, but many seem to just say what they mean outright. AP has a tendency to write songs as a story is written. He doesn't just say what he means, but he shows it and so there's this depth that other songwriters simply don't show. So with that said, that is also why AP's book On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness is so enjoyable to read. He's a natural storyteller. The book is written with beautiful descriptions that carry me off into another world. I feel as though I'm immersed in Aerwiar and all I want throughout the day is to go back into that world and live, see, and feel the adventures of the Igiby children.

Before I get you too convinced about the wonderfulness of this book, I want to note one terrible point about it. Among the many footnotes (which I absolutely love) is one heart-wrenching footnote. This is what it reads:
♫

"For as long as they could remember, Nia had taught the children what she called T.H.A.G.S. 1

1. Three Honored and Great Subjects: Word, Form, and Song. Some silly people believe that there's a fourth Honored and Great Subject, but those mathematicians are woefully mistaken."

What?! Am I a "silly person" who's "woefully mistaken"? I feel cut to the heart at this comment. I sure hope Nia's beliefs aren't a reflection of Andrew's personal beliefs because I literally gasped upon reading it. Three times. In fact, I was so troubled that I didn't know if I could go on reading. But then I realized that Andrew Peterson may never have known the art of mathematics growing up. I feel sorry for him if that is the case and especially sorry for the poor Igiby children who never get even a chance to know the art of mathematics. I digress to say that too many teachers take the beauty and intricacy of mathematics and chop them up and widdle them down until math is just a set of formulas and directions to be followed where not an ounce of joy can be found in it. Even Einstein himself has said,

"It is almost a miracle that modern teaching methods have not yet entirely strangled the holy curiosity of inquiry; for what this delicate little plant needs more than anything, besides stimulation, is freedom."

After contemplating these things, I continued on with my heart broken.

If you can get past that one issue, you will find a wonderful story about three Igiby children, their mother, their one-legged grandfather, Peet the Sock Man, the terrible Fangs, toothy cows and many other people and creatures. It's an exciting book that caused me to refrain from my work or homework and there are lots of little mysteries throughout the book that keep you wondering alongside Janner (the eldest boy).

Actually, I feel that I can't go on writing more since I'm not so great with words (I am a mathematician with apparently no honorable abilities) and I encourage you to read my friend Shannon's post(more blog post here). She says everything I want to with better words (and footnotes!!!). Oh, and if you comment on this post and on hers then you are put in a drawing for winning our giveaway books.

I read her post yesterday and finished the book late last night. And even so as I turned to the last page I found tears in my eyes quite unexpectedly. A wonderful story.

Accepted!

I have been accepted for two things and I'm really excited about both!

The first one is not related to the theme of this blog, but it is due to this blog. Really soon, I hope, I will receive two copies of Andrew Peterson's new book called On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness. However, with this opportunity, I will have to actually read the book before March 17 so as to participate in the Blog Tour. I'm really excited about it, but I'll have to crunch in the time because I'm a slow reader. Who cares about time, though, right?! I know I'm going to love the book and it should be a good quick read. Look for an off-theme post between March 17-21 to see what this book is all about.

The second is related to this blog. I'm accepted to the Acts 29 Project! I'm excited about going and will leave in May and get back in July. Keep me in your prayers as I prepare to go to this secular, Muslim country. More to come on that later. Plus, I will blog on my experiences here while I'm gone.

Prayer & Faith

I realized that I often fail to pray because I don't truly believe that it will change an ounce of what God will do. I don't believe the phrase "When we pray God works." Ask me if I do and I'll say, "Of course!" But look at my actions and my thoughts and they will show otherwise.

I've realized how much faith stems from prayer. To be honest, I'm not big into faith if I don't trust my prayers will ever have much effect. Isn't that what faith is?! So, in the big picture, I'm realizing how much I lack in faith. Now, recognizing it is the first step and it's a big one. It's hard to recognize these problems in faith when all is going well: I'm in a church, a nice campus ministry, Bible study, discipleship, Perspectives course, and I enjoy lots of sweet fellowship. My mind is engaged with God throughout the day, and yet I have trouble trusting Him in many matters of prayer.

I realized this problem around mid-January and I was going to post then. But I didn't and so I'm posting now in hindsight. Since then, I've moved from the initial realization into seeing how it affects my every day life. And from there a faith mindset can move in and kick out my disbelieving current mindset. Hopefully more on this in the future.

Encountering the Gospel

Wow, Perspectives offers a lot of learning. There are so many different things I've pondered lately. One thing is about church planting. The speaker last week really got me thinking and the reading has challenged me quite a bit. By these I have learned about a number of different people groups to whom the gospel has been shared and taken root. It's quite exciting to see how each group learns of Christ and how the gospel spreads throughout each people group. It's also very neat to see how each group worships God differently. And this has really struck me.

The reading encourages the idea of having a people group be self-operating as much as possible from the beginning. So, they form their own groups as they see need and they will meet regularly as large groups, but maybe not weekly or on Sunday. They're all focused on prayer, Scripture reading and teaching, fasting, accountability, etc. When there's a problem, missionaries encourage the group to search the Scriptures for answers and come up with their own decision with the guidance from the missionaries. Also, each group (that I've seen) naturally decides there's a need for a leader and so some are appointed.

I find it so intriguing to think of how people naturally respond to the gospel and Scripture without appointed guidelines on "how to do church." In some respects, I think it's better. They are not "culturally Christian" where we have to separate ourselves from what is said to be Christian by our culture and what is really of Christ Himself. And these short articles and talks are not enough to see all of their cultural blunders so I don't want to lift up all the other people groups and bash our own culture. But it makes me wonder...what would our churches look like if we were without the gospel and it came to us today? Would we have the clean-cut specific doctrinal statements? Would we be more focused on living out the gospel than trying to figure it all out? Would our services look the same? Would we need such specific liturgy? Would our worship songs be so focused on sounding nice so they move our hearts or would they focus more on God? As I've gone throughout the last few days, these questions and more have flooded my mind. Really, what would our churches look like if they didn't have the history that they have from the reformation, or even earlier?

I see why they named this course the way they did.

No More Wavering

Wow, if I had actually posted in the last 2 weeks, it would have been on my lack of prayers for the nations and prayer in general (I'd also explain why, but it may come later), focusing on God's glory for motivation for missions instead of on having compassion for people, and my fears I have in thinking about going somewhere as a missionary. I'll talk about the last one here, but the others I'll have to wait.

Well, Monday we had an amazing speaker who spent 20 years in Papua New Guinea. 6 years they learned the language and for 7 months they presented the gospel. It took 6 1/2 years before anyone could become a convert. But by then so many desperately wanted what God had for them. They understood the Old Testament as a whole and when the missionaries finally got to Christ and his crucifixion, the people of the tribe understood that Christ died for their sins. It took 7 months of weeding out and separating them from their old tales, but they got it. 1hr and 40 min on this topic. Wow. I was moved to tears out of awe and joy and other positive emotions of how the church planting occurred in this tribe by these missionaries. I wish all could have been there to hear of such an experience as his.

So now, I see absolutely no reason not to plan on leaving. My reasons for staying (or, rather, resisting leaving), I've realized are weak. Absolutely weak. For example, some of my fears are: not wanting to leave the nice routine that I can establish here, or family, or friends; not wanting to live among big bugs that are absolutely disgusting; not being able to learn a language and being humbled in the process of trying; not wanting to suffer in any way; not wanting to leave warm showers; not wanting to change my diet, or clothes, or culture in any way; now wanting to get a foreign disease and possibly not treating it as I would here; and the list goes on.

I realized this week that it is immeasurably greater (like the Christianese?) to go and leave all of those fears behind for the sake of reaching nations. The speaker made it come alive as he lived it and absolutely loved it. Sure he had hard times, in fact quite a bit of them, but he counted it as worth it. Also, he was a Southern Californian surfer who didn't want to leave, didn't have the calling and was bad with languages. Nothing should hold us back. And it reminded me of all of the missionaries and martyrs and everything who counted their suffering as being completely worth it. None of them would have traded that time for the luxuries that I have as I write this on my nice PC. So I am determined to go unless God holds me back.

Is the Flu Evil?

"But it's hardly less puzzling how so many believing Christians today can read these same Gospels, commit themselves to following this Jesus, and yet never seriously consider treating sickness and disease (to say nothing of demonized people) the way Jesus treated them."
-Gregory A. Boyd, God at War

He states this after briefly discussing how some believe Jesus was a moral teacher. He puts people like me practically in the same group as people who believe Jesus was a moral teacher. While I'm slightly offended, I'm also intrigued.

His main point was that all of Christ's work, including teaching, exorcisms, healings, miracles and work on the cross, were "acts of war." Okay, fair enough. Certainly Satan ruled this earth and Jesus did come to take back His reign over earth and destroy Satan's rule completely...even if it did take two comings for it to be complete. But Jesus' whole life was, according to the author, about overpowering Satan. My question is: Did everything He did have that purpose?

I ask this because I'm not so sure that diseases and sicknesses are so evil. I'm not so sure that every bit of pain we feel should be cast out. I think the author is right that healings are done in opposition to Satan, but I think that so often we grow so much more in difficult times (including diseases, deaths and sicknesses) that we wouldn't know God apart from those hard times. What about Job's sickness? Or Paul's thorn?

I don't deny that miraculous healings occur today, but should that be my response? If so, when? Should I be so in tune with God that I know when to pray for healing and when to pray for perseverance? Well, we know Paul was persistent in asking God and then God denied him his request. Maybe that should be my response: be persistent until God is clear on His will.

Oh and I have another question (go figure, right?). In Luke 4:38-39 when Jesus heals Simon's mother-in-law, was that an act against evil. It says "[He] rebuked the fever and it left her." The author claims this is an act against demons, and I'm not so sure I would go so far, but it does have the taste that this fever was evil. Hmm...I just don't know what to think.

Well, the point of this reading in Perspectives is to show the church that we should be involved in "overthrowing evil powers just as Jesus had done." And the study guide asks, "Is it possible to carry out Christ's Great Commission without in some way fighting against evil?" Clearly the answer is no. But I think Boyd has a different look on spiritual warfare than I do. Maybe I need to adjust the way I see it, but I'm not so convinced by the argument he gave and the Scriptures he presented. Am I too much of a skeptic?

The Israelites as Missionaries?

One of the early chapters of the Perspectives homework claimed that God did send Israelites to the whole nation with the Great Commission. The author (Walter C. Kaiser) used three texts: Gen 12:1-3, Ex 19:4-6 & Psalm 67. I agree that the Old Testament has the missionary vision all over it, but I'm not convinced that the Israelites of the OT were supposed to actually go to the nations to proclaim God's salvation.

The key people in the OT that he used in the intro to demonstrate his point were: Melchizedek (Gen 14), Jethro (Ex 18), Balaam (Num 23-24), and Jonah. Now, I agree that these people were Gentiles or went to the Gentiles. But were they special cases?

Here's my key question I can't get off my mind: Did God want all nations to have salvation in Him before He sent His son to live and die on earth?

See, the author was clear that the 3 texts I mentioned in Gen, Ex & Psalms are not the only texts in the OT and that there aren't many texts in the OT that are really explicit about missions. He claims that the OT has a general sense of missions throughout. And I totally agree. My problem is that I see it slightly differently. I see it as God wants His fame in every nation, but not necessary salvation for every nation...yet. The OT is filled with "...and then they will know that I am Yahweh God." He says it for Israel and for different nations. But the impression I get from the OT is that that's all God wants from non-Israelites right now - He just wants them to recognize Him and for Him to be completely famous across the earth...for His glory but not their salvation.

In Amos 1 & 2 God proclaims judgment on many nations and also Israel. Each judgment shows the same pattern and each one gives a reason. Here they are:

• "Because [Damascus] threshed Gilead with sledges having iron teeth..."
• "Because [Gaza] took captive whole communities and sold them to Edom..."
• "Because [Tyre] sold whole communities of captives to Edom, disregarding a treaty of brotherhood..."
• "Because [Ammon] ripped open the pregnant women of Gilead in order to extend his borders..."
• "Because [Moab] burned, as if to lime, the bones of Edom's king..."
• "Because [Israel has] rejected the law of Yahweh and have not kept His decrees, because they have been led astray by false gods, the gods their ancestors followed..."

Doesn't it seem like Israel is slightly different than the nations? The nations are ripping people to pieces and Israel isn't following their God. This is just one example of how I don't see God having a desire to be the God of the nations during the period of the OT. Especially when He says in Amos 3:2 "You only have I chosen of all the families of the earth." It seems pretty clear to me that Israel and Israel only is the chosen nation among nations to be God's people. Do we ever hear God saying to other nations, "And you shall be my people and I shall be your God"? Not that I know of.

The whole thing has me confused, so if you can shed any light, I'd appreciate it.